A Norvell Note

Vol. 20 No. 29 | July 23, 2018

What is a family?

We all have our own images, ideas, and thoughts about what family is and means to us. I thought I’d share a few of mine.

A family is the group of people with whom you share a common history. This history may include images of peace and harmony, or it may be filled with chaos and crises. Thoughts of your family may produce feelings of joy and happiness, or they may produce feelings of anger and pain. Your family may now be isolated and distant, or loving and close.

Our families are a collection of personalities unique to our families. Some of these personalities may be considered quirky or strange from an outside perspective. But everyone knows that these personalities are what makes the family special.

The family we were born into is something we were given through no effort of fault of our own. Our parents, good or bad, are our parents. Some parents provide us with a nurturing, loving home, and some were abusive and neglectful. Some of us left home to get away from our parents, some of us have lived close to our parents all of our life.

Some families love deeply, express it openly, and cherish moments together. Some families develop hatred, express it openly, and avoid even being in the same room.

My family has created a history that contains joyful memories, loving relationships, and sadness over the absence of those who are no longer with us. We get together as often as we can and when that time ends, we count the days until we will be together again. I have been blessed with a wonderful family.

There is another family in addition to the one in which we were born…one we are welcomed to join. It is entirely our choice. We have been invited into the family by the One who came up with the idea and still offers sound training and advice on the best way to enjoy it. His family is known for sharing love and kindness and grace and peace and joy with all who want to join.

No, our eclectic, collective family is not always perfect, but we are here to be God’s hands and feet on earth.

And He welcomes us with open arms.

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Vol. 20 No. 29 | July 16, 2018

There was a time when children traveled with their parents to the grocery store, the doctor’s office, or post office to mail a letter (a what?). There was a time when children would wait while dad put gas in the car and listen to the radio, look out the window, or talk to each other in the car. They had no devices to play games on or watch movies or surf Instagram.

There once was a time when you had to open the window of the car by turning a knob and cranking it down. If you needed directions, you used a cumbersome map that was kept in the glove pocket.

There was a time when in order get ice, you had to pull a tray from the freezer by pulling a lever to crack the ice, then dump it out of the tray…making sure your hands weren’t wet so they wouldn’t stick to the tray.

Some remember the days when there were no 24-hour news stations. Why would anyone need that much news? You had to wait until it came on one of the three channels. And the only sports coverage was the game of the week on Saturday or Sunday afternoon.

Please don’t misunderstand, I’m not advocating we go back to those times. I love advanced technology that allows me to write this article on my laptop while flying to witness the arrival of our fifth grandchild. And even if we couldn’t make the trip, we could have watched the first moments after the baby’s arrival on any number of electronic devices.

I also appreciate the advances in the medical community that provide faster and more accurate diagnosis and treatment of illnesses. I appreciate the option to get ice from the door of a refrigerator and the fact that I can wash and dry my clothes from inside my house.

These are good times we live in. But these days aren’t necessarily any better or worse. They’re just different. We functioned and even thrived in the days before smartphones, and we can function and thrive now that we have them.

It is not the stuff we have or don’t have that makes life good, it is what we do with the days we have.

We can have every gadget in the world and huge houses and additional storage spaces to keep them in, and still be miserable. And we can live in the poorest of neighborhoods and struggle to pay the bills and still find contentment and peace.

The Psalmist wrote these words: Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. (Psalm 92:12, NIV)

The writer of Proverbs said:

“Two things I ask of you, Lord;
do not refuse me before I die:
Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, ‘Who is the Lord?’
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God. (Proverbs 30:7-9, NIV)

The Apostle wrote these words: Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. (Ephesians 5:15-16, NIV)

Jesus spoke these words: But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matthew 6:33, NIV)

When it’s all said and done, one of the keys to living and enjoying life is to focus more on how we live than on what we have or don’t have as we live.

My advice for this week is to give our maximum energy to living each day to the fullest and loving every person as much as we possibly can.

UPDATE: #5 Granddaughter – Jennilu Henderson Norvell – made her appearance at 3:37 PM EST on July 15, 2018. Baby, Mom, Dad, and two big sisters are healthy and full of joy.  Oh, this Papa is blessed beyond imagination.

To order Until Hope Returns click here Order the Book.

If you order, please leave a review.

A Norvell Note © Copyright 2018 Tom Norvell All Rights Reserved

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Vol. 20 No. 28 | July 9, 2018

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Sometimes life moves fast.

You are in the midst of a family-crisis and news comes that a dear friend has been rushed to the Emergency Room. As you frantically make your way to the ER, you get a call from your boss, asking for the sales report from last week.

You and your wife are determined to reduce your spending and get out of debt, when your company decides to cut back on labor and your hours. As you think of a way to break the news to your wife, she calls and says your daughter needs to get her wisdom teeth removed, something your insurance won’t cover.

You are doing your best to care for your aging parents. You think you have it all under control when your father has a stroke.

Your daughter is graduating from college, your son is graduating from high school, and your sister is getting married all on the same weekend.

You agreed to serve on an important church committee, the parent’s association at your children’s school needs a committee chairman, and you’ve already committed to coach your daughter’s soccer team.

Sometimes life moves fast, sometimes at a pace we’re not sure we can manage.

We all handle these times differently. Some people attack it, treating it as just another obstacle to overcome, one more mountain to climb.

Some people live in denial, ignoring the problems, hoping they will go away.

Some people run away, shirking their responsibilities, hoping others will take care of them.

But there is a better way.

During the last week of His life, Jesus was celebrated with a parade in his honor and also confronted by people who hated him. He spent time with his followers, giving them final instructions on what to do when He was gone. He was arrested, put on trial, beaten, mocked, found guilty, and nailed to a cross.

But when He left the garden, He walked out courageously, knowing what lie ahead, more determined than ever to finish His Father’s work.

How did Jesus handle it? In the midst of it all, He went to the garden and prayed.

Maybe this is what we should do. Maybe the best thing we can do is to stop our frantic efforts to fix everything, find a quiet place, and pray. This can feel scary, and we can come up with a thousand excuses why it will never work. But maybe we should just try it.

Maybe taking time to be with the Lord might be the best thing we can do, for ourselves, and for those we are trying to help.

When life starts moving too fast- you feel overwhelmed, your adrenaline starts racing, you want to run away or feel like you might collapse under the pressure- do what Jesus did: find a quiet place and pray.

Don’t be surprised if life comes at you fast and hard this week. But don’t be defeated by it either. Use the resources God has given you to make your way through it, and do your best to find joy in the process.

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To order Until Hope Returns click here Order the Book.

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A Norvell Note © Copyright 2018 Tom Norvell All Rights Reserved

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Vol. 20 No. 27 | July 2, 2018

Recovering from the Loss

It was two outs in the top of the 9^th inning of the College World Series. The Arkansas Razorbacks were up 3-2 over the Oregon State Beavers. The Razorbacks needed one more strike and they would win the 2018 College World Series. The fans were calling the Hogs, ready to explode in celebration. The batter fouled the ball down the first base line. Everyone thought it was over. The First Baseman, Second Basemen, and Right Fielder were in position to make the catch and win the series.

Only they didn’t. There have been various explanations as to why they didn’t make the catch. The lights bothered them. No one called for it. There is no reason for blame. The look on the faces of the three players, the faces of the coaches and players in the dugout, and the faces of the thousands of fans expressed it all. My heart went out to the three players.

Oregon State went on to score two runs, take the lead, and win the game. They dominated the third and final game the next night to claim the championship. Stunned and dejected, Arkansas players and fans around the country silently watched as the Oregon State Beavers charged the field in unrestrained joy. Congratulations to the Oregon State players. You played well and are now the National Champions.

For the Arkansas players, you played well, too, and almost accomplished your goal. My heart broke with you and for you, and I wonder how you recover from a loss like that.

My short answer is I don’t know. My hope is that the coaches and players are surrounded by family and friends who love and encourage them, reminding them that, although it was a big game, it was game. In a game, someone will win and someone will lose. And then we have to move on to the next game.

I hope they are able to recognize that, although the pain is deep and difficult to bear right now, it is not the end. Small comfort, I know, but true.

Recovering from a loss, any loss, is difficult, so how do we do it? Even a small loss is a loss. It hurts. We experience loss on a daily basis. So I’ll offer a few simple suggestions for sports fans and others in the midst of coping with a loss.

Acknowledge it for what it is. You have lost something or someone. The person or thing was of great value to you and when it or they are gone…it hurts. Find someone who will listen to you express your feelings (a friend, a spouse, a counselor, a mentor).

I love these words from Michael Card:

“Don’t read me pointless poems, friend

Don’t diagnose, don’t condescend,

Though you may be right to disagree

I need someone to weep with me.”

(Michael Card, “I Will Not Walk Away”

from the The Hidden Face of God album)

Give yourself permission to grieve. The process of grief takes time and is necessary for your healing. Don’t rush it. Don’t avoid it. Don’t apologize for it. Grief is real and must be allowed to happen.

Give yourself time. It will take time. You will not pop out of bed the next day after a loss and be fine. You will want to be, but chances are, it will take more time than you want it to. Give yourself time.

Feel what you feel. Feelings and emotions are just that: feelings and emotions. Everyone has them. Don’t apologize for them, but don’t abuse people with them. Whatever you are feeling is okay. God can handle it.

Enjoy the progress. Eventually, you will feel better. I don’t know when, but one day you will realize that the pain is not as intense. You will still have those days when a wave of grief hits you, causing you to thrash around to regain your stamina. Try and prepare for anniversary dates, birthdays, special events and holiday seasons. But you will begin to feel better as the healing takes place.

In Luke 15, you can find three stories of loss and recovery. Take time this week to read and reflect on them, and let the Word be part of your healing.

And for the Razorback Nation…Woo Pig Sooie!

To order Until Hope Returns click here Order the Book.

 

A Norvell Note © Copyright 2018 Tom Norvell All Rights Reserved

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Vol. 20 No. 26 | June 25, 2018

Live As Jesus Did

If you have a favorite sports team, you probably have a shirt, hat, or jacket you wear on game day to show your support. You may go to great lengths and distances to see them play, support them, and demonstrate you’re a loyal fan.

You may work for a company that requires you to wear a uniform and/or badge to identify you as an employee. You wear it with pride because it shows that you are a member of something you are proud of.

If you are married, you may wear a ring on your left hand to signify you have devoted your life to one special person.

Religious groups tend to place all kinds of requirements on one another that are designed to prove we are really who we claim to be. Some groups require attendance to certain events to prove we are who we say we are. Some groups require us to use certain language that outsiders are not familiar with. Another group may require us to meet certain standards before we are considered worthy of membership.

Meeting these requirements can become so much of a burden that many will give up in frustration and despair. But that wasn’t the plan for Jesus and His followers. In fact, one of His only requirements for being a follower is revealed in this simple statement:

“Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did.” (1 John 2:6)

Let’s try to do that. It’s not necessarily an easy task and may require more out of us than we might think. But I think it’s worth an honest attempt.

When confronted with criticism and opposition, respond like Jesus did.

When faced with seemingly impossible situations, face them like Jesus did.

When comforting a sick or grieving friend, comfort them like Jesus did.

It won’t always be easy. It won’t always be fun. But it will bring you more pleasure than you might imagine. It won’t always be the thing you really want to do, but in the long run you will be glad you lived like Jesus did.

So this week, relax and enjoy living like Jesus did.

To order my book, Until Hope Returns click here Order the Book.

A Norvell Note © Copyright 2018 Tom Norvell All Rights Reserved

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Vol. 20 No. 25 | June 18, 2018

I heard about another church leader who is discouraged. Then, I heard of another who is frustrated, and another who wants to quit after serving his ministry for many years.

Don’t worry, this is not a discourse on how ministers, church leaders, and their families are mistreated. Yes, many are treated poorly. But I’d like to focus on the positive and make a few suggestions on how we can encourage our leaders.

NOTE: I consider a ‘church leader’ to be anyone who serves in a leadership role, such as a preacher, teacher, worship leader, youth leader, elder, shepherd, or deacon.

First, take every opportunity to say something encouraging.

To the person leading the sermon, for instance, I guarantee he or she needs to hear something encouraging. When speakers share the Word in front of a group of people, they become easy targets for criticism. The was too long or too short. You were too loud, or not loud enough. Your sermons are too deep, or too shallow. For every ten positive comments received, it is the negative one that will consume his or her thoughts afterward.

We need to remember that these leaders have worked for hours during the week preparing something to offer words of encouragement, help us know God better, and live more like Jesus. We need to do the same for them.

Maybe say something like, “I loved that story you shared, thank you.” Or, “I never thought of that perspective before.” Or, “Thank you for all that you do for us.”

Second, pray for your leaders.

Pray for them to have wisdom and discernment. Pray for them to lead with boldness and gentleness. Pray for them to withstand the attacks they receive on a daily basis- from church members disguised at what can feel like the enemy. Pray for them to clearly see and hear the Lord’s guidance for them and the church. Tell them you are praying for them.

Third, support them.

Let those who lead you spiritually feel your support and know you appreciate their leadership. Support them financially. Support them emotionally and with your physical presence. It’s difficult to lead courageously when you feel like you’re all alone, when you’re not sure you can pay your bills, or when you’re sad and discouraged.

Fourth, love them.

Just love them. No matter what. No matter when. No matter how. Just love them like Jesus would love them.

Yes, I recently heard of another discouraged church leader. It always saddens me. I always want to do something to help. I may not be able to change the circumstances or fix what is happening. But I can encourage them. I can pray for them, support them, and assure them that I love them…no matter what, no matter when, no matter how.

I can love them like Jesus. So can you.

To order my book, Until Hope Returns click here Order the Book.

To view the video click here: Until Hope Returns, and order it at Order the Book.

There will be two book signings in the Nashville area on June 23.

One in Lebanon from 10 AM-Noon at 3:Sixteen Boutique (108 East Main Street)

Another at The Well Coffeehouse (690 East Old Hickory Boulevard, Brentwood, TN 37027) from 7-9 PM

 

A Norvell Note © Copyright 2018 Tom Norvell All Rights Reserved

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Vol. 20 No. 24 | June 11, 2018

To order my book, Until Hope Returns click here Order the Book.

To view the video click here: Until Hope Returns, and order it at Order the Book.

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The weather is different. The air feels different. The traffic, neighborhoods and houses are different. The landscapes, sunrises and sunsets are different. My work and routine are different.

But although I’ve experienced a lot of changes since moving across country, much has stayed the same.

God has not changed. He still loves us and continues to demonstrate His love on a daily basis. He continues to guide us as we make decisions and remind us of His presence. He continues to open new avenues of friendship and reveal His purpose for our lives. God is still good.

The way people are has not changed. Some are nice, and some are not. Some are friendly, and some are not. Some are life-giving, and some drain the life out of you.

No matter where you go, people are searching for meaning, striving to improve, and possibly feel like something is missing. Even if they don’t always know what that is, the pace at which they try to find it continues.

There is still a need for kindness and understanding. There is still a need for gentleness, love and peace.

Surroundings change. Circumstances change. People and relationships change. But life goes on, bringing. Life brings good days and bad ones. It gives us days filled with joy and days filled with sadness. Life challenges us and life rewards us.

The circumstances and surroundings of my life have changed dramatically over the last several weeks. But I am still loved, I am still a child of God, and I am still living with the assurance that He takes pleasure in me.

You may not realize it, but the same is true for you. Whatever is or is not going on inside and around you, and whatever you have done or not done, God still loves you. Wherever you go, God is with you, and you are His child. Whatever happens or does not happen, you can live with the assurance that the One who created you takes great pleasure in you.

I hope you find peace in these certainties.

A Norvell Note © Copyright 2018 Tom Norvell All Rights Reserved

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Vol. 20 No. 23 | June 4, 2018

It’s official. We closed on our home, and with the help of dear friends, loaded the rental truck and said our goodbyes. After two days traveling, we arrived at our new home, greeted by church friends who helped us unload the truck in about thirty minutes. What a blessing!

We now live in Texas near our daughter, her husband and two of our granddaughters. And I begin my new job on Monday.

More exciting news: my book, Until Hope Returns, was officially released on June 1.

You can see a video about the book here: Until Hope Returns, and order it at Order the Book

I am blessed and loved and very thankful…a good start to our new adventure.

A Norvell Note© Copyright 2018 Tom Norvell All Rights Reserved

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Father,

As we prepare to make a change of our physical address, I ask these things:

That You constantly remind us of Your presence and continue to guide us on our next journey, just as You have guided us through all of our past ones.

That You help us keep our eyes and ears open to new opportunities to love, encourage, and show the same gentleness and kindness to others as You have shown to us.

That You remind us that all change, even change we initiate, brings some pain and new challenges. But it also brings new adventures.

That You continue to protect and encourage the people we are leaving behind, fill the void that will come while we are apart, and assure them that our hearts and friendship will never be absent.

That You remind us that physical distance is nothing in comparison to the closeness we feel by our union through Your Spirit, and that this distance is only temporary.

That You fill us with Your Spirit as we move into new places, work environments, and arenas so that we may demonstrate the fullness of Your love to those we meet.

That You fill us with the same sense of generosity and hospitality toward others as others have always shown us.

That You constantly remind us that we are never alone and help us provide comfort to others when they feel alone.

That You develop within us the ability to be living expressions of Your Spirit so that others may see You when they see us.

That You accept our thanks for all that You have done, for all the people You have allowed us to love and be loved by in return, and for the joy that we have experienced throughout our journey.

“Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.” (Philippians 4:5)

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Vol. 20 No. 21 | May 21, 2018

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Sometimes God works like this.

Easter 2018: I am confused and somewhat discouraged, growing tired of waiting. It’s been eighteen months since I left full-time ministry. These months have been extremely slow and quiet as I’ve searched for work that felt like the Lord’s calling. To get by in the meantime, I’ve dabbled in teaching, counseling, retail work, and some time with a driving service.

These months have been long, sometimes lonely, sometimes dark, and sometimes filled with deep despair. I wondered what God was doing. I always knew He was working for my good, but I didn’t understand what He was doing. I often prayed, actually begged for Him to reveal His plan. We had many one-sided conversations.

But through His word and the silence, I was constantly reminded: “I am here, Tom. I have this. I have you.” I trusted Him and knew He was trustworthy…but it was a difficult eighteen months.

My family and I often talked about moving closer to where our daughter and her family live (with another little one on the way). I remember saying to my wife, “Let just sell our place, pack up our things and go.” She politely responded with something to the effect of, “Well, it’s an idea.”

On April 5, I received a call from a close friend telling me about a ministry opportunity in a city we love. But it wasn’t close to our daughter. The job description had my name all over it. This was the kind of ministry I had been looking for.

The story continues.

April 18: I discover I have a torn retina.

April 19: I have the torn retina laser repaired, which delayed my telephone interview for the ministry position by one day.

April 20: I have the telephone interview with the director of the ministry. My mind exploded with possibilities.

Later that afternoon, our home phone rings. The only calls we ever get on that phone are from solicitors telling me they can help with my credit card debt, or reduce my student loans, or announce we’ve won an all-expense paid trip to…

Expecting this to be a similar call, I answered with a gruff, somewhat annoyed voice: “Who is this?” He told me. “But how did you get this number?” I asked. “It was on your application.” He politely responded. I responded with confusion, “I never give this number out. I don’t even know what it is, to be honest.”

The next thing I knew, I had a Skype interview set for the following Monday with Harbor Hospice in Austin, Texas. Our daughter lives just south of Austin (check out The Thatcher Buda).

April 22: Our granddaughter is born in Buda, Texas.

April 23: My plane lands in Austin, Texas. Within an hour, I’m holding my granddaughter, Juniper Blue.

An hour later, I get a call from the from the Supervisor confirming the Skype interview. “I’ll be ready. In fact, I’m in Texas now.” “Oh really,” he said, “then let’s meet in person.” We meet later that afternoon. Two days later, I receive a call requesting a second interview.

April 27: I have a very positive second interview.

April 28: I fly home.

April 30: I drive to the city to interview for the previously mentioned position. I have lunch with a friend and then go to my favorite coffee shop to ponder all that is going on. A call comes from Harbor Hospice in Austin, Texas with an offer.

I accept two days later.

May 11: We put our condo up for sale. Within in forty-eight hours, we receive a cash offer. We close on May 31.

I begin work on June 4.

Oh, I failed to mention, as all of this is happening, my publisher and I were putting the final touches on my book, Until Hope Returns, to be released within the next few weeks. (details to come)

Why do I share all of this? Because sometimes God works like this. We wait. We wonder. We pray. We beg. We wait some more. Then the silence ends, and God reveals what He has been up to.

Are you waiting for things to work out? Don’t give up. God is already at work. He has your back. In His time, He will reveal His plan. And when He does, it will likely be better than you could have imagined.

A Norvell Note© Copyright 2018 Tom Norvell All Rights Reserved

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