Know My Heart

Vol. 17 No. 34 | August 24, 2015

Psalm-139If only you, God, would slay the wicked!
Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty!
They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord,
and abhor those who are in rebellion against you?
I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:19-24, NIV)

Do I really want to do this? Am I ready to do this? Am I brave enough to ask You to search me and test me? Do I really want You to know my anxious thoughts? Am I comfortable enough with You to invite You to look inside and see if there is any offensive way in me? Is there another option?

You already know all this. You have known me since before I was formed. You have known all my anxious thoughts, You have known my heart, You have known all the offensive ways in me, and You have been ready to lead me in the way everlasting my whole life.

You know there that are people that I consider enemies. Unfortunately too many times my reasons for calling them wicked or enemies are for selfish reasons, not because they have evil intent or misuse Your name or live in rebellion to You. I, too often, count them as wicked or as enemies because they do not look, think, act, or live the way I would prefer them to look, think, act, or live. You do not have too look very far to know that there are offensive ways in me. If You did not know me so well, and love me so much, that would create even more anxious thoughts in me.

In spite of the anxiety it produces  or how fearful of it I am, I ask You, Father, to search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

Search me, God. Look all over me. Look inside me. Examine each detail of me. I am Yours. You know me. Search me, God and know my heart.

Test me. Try me. Challenge me. Push me. Check to see who I really am.

Know my anxious thoughts. When life seems unstable know my anxious thoughts. When it seems everything spinning out of control know my anxious thoughts. When my inward self is restless and frightened know my anxious thoughts. When I have difficulty seeing You and hearing You know my anxious thoughts.

See if there is any offensive way in me. There are offensive ways in me. I know it. You know it. Help me clean them out. Keep them away.

Lead me in the way everlasting. Lead me, Lord. Please lead me. Lead me in Your ways. I want my ways to be Your ways…Your everlasting ways.

Father, You handle my enemies. Make the only enemies I have be those who are enemies of Yours. And Father, since You know me better than I know myself, thank You for loving me, empowering me, and challenging me to be more like You.

Tom

A Norvell Note © Copyright 2015. Tom Norvell All Rights Reserved.

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