A Norvell Note for November 15, 2021Vol. 24 No. 45
When You Do Speak
There is a time to be silent, and yes, there is a time to speak. But, when you do talk, here are a few things to consider, which come from Ephesians 4:29, when the New Testament writer, Paul, shared his guidelines for living the Christian life.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (NIV)
Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift. (The Message)
Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear. (NRSV)
Think about what you are going to say.
For many years when I read these words, I assumed the writer was saying, “Quit your cussin’ and don’t tell dirty jokes!” I have come to understand that there is a deeper meaning. Many words and expressions can be more destructive and damaging than curse words, such as hate, harmful, judgmental, abusive, and useless language. Read what you have typed out loud before hitting send on that text, email, or social media post. Do you want to say that? Before you drop that angry letter in the mail slot at the Post Office (Do you remember where the Post Office is?), read it out loud. Do you want to send it? Think about what you are going to say before you say them.
Think about your purpose for speaking.
The text says: “but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Are you trying to say something helpful for those who listen? If not, why say it? Are you speaking to impress people or build them up? If so, be quiet. Just because you want to say something does not mean you should say it. Think about your purpose.
My intent for writing is not to shut anyone down or keep anyone from talking. Instead, my purpose is to say things and encourage others to say something worth hearing.
Let’s use our voices for good. Let’s think about what we are saying and why we are saying it.
Father, whether we are speaking to our spouse or partner, children or parents, employer or employee or co-worker, student or teacher, stranger or friend, or self, give us words that help and build up, then remind us to use those words.
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