Vol. 20 No. 52 | December 31, 2018
Sometimes being listened to is so much like being loved, it is impossible to tell the difference. (Barbara Pine)
I do not know who Barbara Pine is or the context of her words (I read them on sojo.net), but when I read them, I ask myself: If that is true how many people felt loved because I listened to them? If that is true how many opportunities did I miss to love someone by talking when I should have listened?
Images appear in my mind of conversations in which my desire to make sure my opinions were heard, prevented me from hearing the thoughts or, more importantly the feelings of the person in front of me.
Conversations echo in my head where I was too busy or too occupied with my own interests to really listen.
I recall messages I received that I either failed to answer, or waited much too long to answer that may have indicated to the sender that I did not care.
I missed the chance to connect with some people because I was too lazy or so self-absorbed to take the time to reach out to them.
When I read Pine’s words I am also reminded of Jesus’ admonition:
Whoever has ears, let them hear. (Matthew 11:15, NIV)
And I recall the instruction from James:
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. (James 1:19-20, NIV)
The words cause me to look back with regret, but also motivate me to be more conscious of my role as a listener. The words stir a desire within me to demonstrate my love for people by taking the time to listen…to really listen.
Someone you know may be needing to talk, and they may need you to listen. I hope you will.
You may need to talk and have someone really listen. I hope you will seek out a friend, a family member, or a professional counselor and talk.
Sometimes we just need to be loved by having someone listen to us. Sometimes we just need to love someone by listening.
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