Vol. 20 No. 12 | March 18, 2018
Here’s a question that might get your attention: Is there someone you need to forgive?
Remember this prayer?
“Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespassed against us.”
When Jesus was washing the disciples’ feet and he came to Judas and Peter, He lovingly washed theirs like all the others, despite knowing they would betray him.
When Jesus was dying on the cross, he prayed, “Father, forgive them. They do not know what they are doing.”
Forgiveness is not something to be ignored. Paul said, “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.” (Ephesians 4:26-27, NIV)
So is there someone you need to forgive? What is stopping you? Are you waiting for them to ask for forgiveness? That could be a long wait, especially if they are not aware they’ve harmed you.
We teach our children to forgive. When another child takes a toy away from them, or bites them, or calls them a name, we are quick to say, “Oh, it’s okay. She didn’t mean to.” When a brother and sister get into an argument or one of them does something that hurts the other, we make them apologize or say, “She said she’s sorry, so you just need to forgive her and let it go.”
It’s amazing how well this works with children and it sounds easy enough. “You just need to forgive her and let it go.”
But then we grow up, and it’s not so easy, is it? The offense is usually something more damaging than losing a toy or being called a name. The offense might cause physical, mental or emotional pain. It might involve the loss of money, or damaged property, or the suffering of a loved one.
You hear those words again, “You just need to forgive her and let it go.”
You hear Jesus’s words again, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespassed against us.”
Forgiveness is not always easy. In fact, it can sometimes feel impossible. Or we may say, “I’ll forgive them, but I’ll never forget what they did.” There is some truth in that. There are some offenses that leave scars that may never be erased. But even if we never are able to forget, this does not release us from our responsibility to forgive.
That’s right. It is our responsibility to forgive, whether or not the person asks for forgiveness or even cares if we forgive them. Forgiveness heals both us and them.
So, how do we do it? How do we forgive? It seems to me the ability to forgive another human being has to do with the amount of love we let ourselves experience and give to another human being. That is the only explanation for how Jesus was able to wash the feet of his betrayers and ask God to forgive those who had beaten, cursed and mocked Him while He was dying on the cross. He loved Peter and Judas so much, He freely offered them forgiveness. He loved the people surrounding the cross and those of us who have lived through the ages so much, He freely asked and continues to ask God to forgive us.
If we come from a place of love, then we can love people, even those who hurt us deeply, and use that love to forgive them. When we are confronted with wanting to or needing to forgive someone, we are also confronted with whether or not we are going to give love to another person.
Do you love them? Can you love them even after they have hurt you or your loved one? If you choose not to forgive them, who will it really hurt?
Living this life as a follower of Jesus always comes back to loving people, doesn’t it? “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.” (1 John 3:16, NIV)
Let me ask you the original question again: Is there someone you need to forgive?
Think about it. Pray about it. Sometimes we need help walking through the process of forgiving. If I can help you, let me know.
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